Just a Girl in the World

and….I’m also a feminist.  When I was a little girl, the interests I had and the passions I pursued had little or nothing to do with what the other little girls did.  I cared nothing for clothes, make-up, or dolls..   In fact, my only toys were stuffed animals and my record player.  Later, I built my own drum set our of the metal pieces of my brother’s erector set.   When I went to parties with the neighborhood girls, or my own cousins even, I felt like I was from another planet.  I thought:  “They are so boring.   Can I go climb a tree or play a guitar or pet a doggy?”

In our current zeitgeist, the phrase “gender dysphoria” is fairly well-known and tossed about, but when I was a kid, it was not.  Never in a million years did I think maybe I was born the wrong gender.   I always figured it was just in the grand scheme of things that people like me felt somewhat weird and isolated, even when I was among friendly and non-antagonistic people.

In elementary school, I first heard the song “I Am Woman” on popular AM radio.  It was an epiphany for me, let me just say that.  Thank goodness for Helen Reddy, because I had no idea that anyone on earth cared about my personal plight.    What was that plight?   Hmmmm…

Women or girls were not expected to be full actualized members of the human race somehow.  They were expected to subjugate themselves to the will of men and the needs of the children they bare, without pursuing their own interests, needs, or passions.   But this song showed another side.  “You can bend but never break me, cause it only serves to make me more determined to achieve my final goal.”

Girls in the classroom have a particular plight:  nobody loves the smartest girl in the room.  She is often thought of as  conceited or brash, or even a “bitch” or “Know it all.”   America seconded this motion twice when two of the smartest girls in the room ran for the presidency and were rebuked.   I don’t believe this country will ever have more than a modicum of female leadership.  It is just too convenient for too many people to have the men in charge as always, and the women working for them, behind them.

And do you know who reinforced this lesson the most in my life?  My own mother.  I loved her dearly, but she really did kind of mess me up.  In the 8^th grade, I was getting bad grades in math, and so my mother came into my room late at night to have a serious chat:  “Audrey, if you don’t start to do better at math, then you’ll have to marry an old rich man to support you.”

hMMM. Ok so that was the reason I should do better?   Ok mom.  Thanks for the advice.

We are currently experiencing a type of reversal, or so it seems SORT OF.  One of the podcasts I listen to is about how MEN and BOYS need help nowadays, and how they are failing.   Listen, I don’t want or root for anyone failing, but are you kidding me?  Men have ruled the earth for more than 2000 years with very few exceptions.   It is extraordinarily difficult for me to feel sorry for them.

I will give Mr. Professor G this:  men and boys have definitely gotten lazier.   As a teacher, I have seen the majority of boys plummet into classroom oblivion by sheer laziness and disinterest in absolutely anything except video games.

It’s hard for a teacher to compete with the dopamine bursts provided by games like Call of Duty or Fortnight, I’m guessing.  I’ve actually never played either one. 

I have been giving a certain type of writing assignment for many years, and the students usually enjoy it because they have freedom to choose pretty much any topic they want to write about.  I then ask for volunteers to read theirs out loud (for extra credit).  In the past decade, I have noticed a decline in the variety of topics:  They used to write about sports, animals, family vacations, experiences in the world,  foods, so many things.  Currently, I hear about video games…over, and over, and over. From the boys….and maybe a girl once in a long while.  Not only is it alarming….but it is so damn BORING.  The minute I hear their topic, I want to get our a fork and stick it into my eyeball.   And then I need to give feedback!!!  Que horrible! The stuff of nightmares!

So boys have succumbed to the video game addiction, and I think so have many men.  I guess they are wired for it somehow.

Here’s the kicker:   male wealth in the US outflanks female weath by a million percent.  Ok, here let me do some research… clickety-clack on computer to Google AI:  women held 17% of the spots on the 2024 Forbes list of the richest people in the US.  No matter how dedicated women are, how reliable they are, how successful in academics and/or work life they are, women just cannot get ahead in this man’s world.   By and large, women are still saddled down by family and household demands, and men are not nearly as much so. Plus, we still can’t walk the streets alone at night feeling safe. 

In 1971, Judy Syfers wrote an iconic article for New York magazine entitled “I Want a Wife.”  And no, this was not some lesbian soft porn tease, it was about how wives prop up their husbands and families so that they can be successful in the world, all the while repressing their own desires for success and self-actualization.

I do feel bad that there are seemingly a lot of suicidal boys (although I think there are as many suicidal girls due to weight or appearance issues). I feel bad that so many screwed up boys want to shoot random people for no real reason.  I feel bad that so many straight girls are rejecting boys these days and opting for either asexuality or just female friendships or maybe even being gay ladies.

BUT boys and men need to MAN UP. You’re still the damn kings of the world for now.  Hell.. if I were a dude, I’d sure take advantage of my privileged status.  Throw on a tie and the world is your oyster. So gentleman…..Take a stand against the piggies of your gender! You’ll be adored by lots of women if you do. And one more thing: would this pig EVER say “Quiet Piggy! To a man?

That’s my rant for today.  Thanks for listening, all seven of you, and please feel free to leave a comment, cursing my existence or otherwise, down there is comment land.

and folks, always remember that even in the middle of the shittiest days, there are still lots of ways to have a good time.